Rise of the Runelords: Anniversary Edition

Session: Screw with Hellknights

Hellknights Meet Wubba Wubba

Now available in handy MP3 format: https://soundcloud.com/c0rvidae/operation-trollthehellknights

The party went shopping. With the well-deserved coin from the loot they brought back with them, the group decided to buy pretty things and some useful things and even some pretty useful things.

They left Sandpoint to travel to the city of Korvosa to return the shield with crest on it. They found the Jeggare family in the well-to-do/old-money Northern District after asking a delivery man. Soovi returned a rich lady’s dog via the scruff of its neck after it scared the delivery man’s horse. Let it be known Falar does not like rich, civilized people. Let it also be known that Versago fiercely resisted the urge to steal a lot of things.

Finding the estate, the party was introduced by the resident porter to Martiln Jeggare and proceeded to return the shield to him. He was thankful, spoke about presumably a son who he couldn’t help because of societal imprudence or some other rich man problem. In return, he gave the party a gem called ‘The Flame Cut’. Gems that have their own name are generally worth a shiny coin or two.

The party was getting a little restless at this point, and Senka led a party discussion considering ways to antagonize the ‘Order of the Nail’ – a group of Hellknights located here in Korvosa.

The discussion invariably led to talk about using the Wand of Wonder for shenanigans at the hellknight’s fortress. So with giggles abound, Versago began their fun with two little words: “Wubba Wubba.” Out spat lightning bolts and fireballs onto the nearby bridge, and then the whole party was amazed as an elephant fell out of the sky and landed on the burning bridge. The bridge being rather hot and fiery, the elephant angrily charged into the fort looking for a little revenge.

The next casting of the wand turned the nearby tower from stone into flesh, ripping it off its supporting structures and falling with a flesh-rending splat. Then some gemstones flew out of the wand to embed themselves into the nearby wall. After that, Versago’s hair had apparently had enough of this fun, and proceeded to fall out – all of it.

Then the roof of the nearby building dissipated and turned to smoke. The last charge proceeded to be pointed at another tower but nothing appeared to happen. The party ran away, laughing the whole while.

The group spent the night at a nearby inn and went back the next day to have the same fun over again, just at a different part of the fortress. Thinking like the smarty-pants they are, the party went invisible and Versago quaffed a potion of fly, proceeding to take aim.

This time, Senka brought snacks and Falar started a drinking game. The wand started the fun off with gemstones and coins flying out. Then the crazy awesome fun began. First, time stopped for Versageo and when it started suddenly again, a medieval rave began as loud party music blared out from all directions. The hellknights below were then compelled to dance along. Then lasers started flying. One of the guardsmen was turned to stone. Then they all disappeared. Then a pixie appeared and things got really fun.

As Versago flew away and his invisibility wore off, he realized he had transformed to look like a 120 year old man, with long flowing grey hair and beard. Back at the inn, the laughter went on and on as many in party agreed it was the best time they had ever had. Just before retiring, Falar offered to show Versago how to braid his new long, grey beard. Senka, however, suggested that he return to the ‘smooth as a baby’s bottom’ look from when his hair fell out. A great day, all in all.


Mattzm C0rvidae

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